HOW TO STOP PROCRASTINATING PART II

Congrats my fellow procrastinator!  You made it to part 2. Or, f@ck you because you skipped over all my hard work and went to this part of the article.  Either way, let’s keep helping you.

Identity. Finally, and one of the most important reasons for why we procrastinate has to do with your current identity.  I am using a brilliant insight from the writing of James Clear (author of the book Atomic Habits and many other incredible articles), in a slightly different way, to suggest part of why and how we overcome procrastination.

In an article from his website, https://jamesclear.com/, James writes The key to building lasting habits is focusing on creating a new identity first. Your current behaviors are simply a reflection of your current identity. What you do now is a mirror image of the type of person you believe that you are (either consciously or subconsciously).”  

He goes on to say “Many people begin the process of changing their habits by focusing on what they want to achieve. This leads us to outcome-based habits. The alternative is to build identity-based habits. With this approach, we start by focusing on who we wish to become.”

I encourage you to read more about building long lasting habits in his book, Atomic Habits or his article, https://jamesclear.com/identity-based-habits, to fully contextualize what he is saying.  However, essentially James is saying that in order to build long lasting habits, you need to let go of your current identity, in favor of who you want to be.  For example; say you want to be a better mother.  Then become the type of mother who is fully present with her children every day.

So, start with, as James puts it, a “small win” or baby steps.  Perhaps you can put your smartphone away for an hour each day and use that time to be fully present with your children. Followed by another series of present minded steps or activities. Ultimately these small wins or baby steps, done with consistency, will result in you reaching your goal of becoming a better mother.

I am building upon James’s Identity Based Habits work and approach to suggest that in addition to the approach being a recipe for sustaining desired behavior and results, it is also a very effective tool for pushing past procrastination.  

As a personal example of this use, here is what I say and envision when I don’t want to workout and would rather eat a bag of Skittles.  “What would an athlete and an example of health do right now, Neil?”  You see, part of the identity I am building towards is that of an athlete and a pillar of health for myself, my clients and the people I love.  So, an athlete would put down the bag of Skittles and get their ass into the gym and work on his or her health. Period.  

In other words, when I procrastinate, I think about the person I want to be, along with that type of person’s lifestyle and choices.  This process ultimately inspires me to make the tough but correct decision, as it is what the person I am trying to become would do.

I can’t express how effective this tool has been for me in overcoming procrastination.  But it has also been incredible for motivation (both immediately and for sustaining motivation), for a host of goals I have been working towards achieving.

One quick nugget for procrastinators who just can’t go any further in this article… In chapter 13 of Atomic Habits, James has a “Two Minute Rule” to stop procrastinating. It is a simple and effective tool (of many) to help you stop procrastinating. 

One important qualifier about identity though.  In order for this or any tool to be effective, you have to want to change or overcome the procrastination.  Seems simple enough… but it isn’t.  You really need to identify a bigger, motivational purpose. Ask yourself, “What is the bigger purpose and the longer term value I get from doing or achieving this thing?” “Is what I am doing valuable, and does it fit into my bigger purpose?” 

For example; Would taking a course right now on website development currently support your bigger purpose of being a psychologist who heals patient traumas?  Well, It might, if you are launching a new website for your psychology practice and you can’t afford the cost of a developer, or for some reason you don’t care to use a DIY website builder.  However, it might not if the course does not support or enhance your purpose or provide value needed to be a powerfully successful psychologist, and instead is pulling your time and resources in another direction.  Make sense?

In short, if you don’t see any bigger purpose or material value in why you want to overcome procrastination and do this difficult “thing”, then aspiring to a new identity or powering through something you are procrastinating on, like overcoming a challenge such as losing weight, writing a book, launching a business, getting excellent grades, etc., won’t matter.  Period.

You need to have a clear purpose and definitive value from the thing you want to do.  

I don’t want to go on about “purpose” in this article, but felt a brief introduction and glimpse into it was an important and necessary component to helping you overcome procrastination.  I am currently writing an article on the importance of having “purpose”, which will delve deeper into why having it is critical, not only for dealing with procrastination, but because it is ultimately a major part of what brings us true happiness and long term fulfillment.  

So, look out for that one.  In the meantime, feel free to Google “the importance of purpose” in order to jump ahead and understand this vital component to building a life of happiness and contentment.

Anyway, I digress! That was long winded, but necessary.  Let’s now delve into a few simple things you can do to beat procrastination.

Solutions.

A few simple steps, but first a longer one.

  • Ask yourself something.  “What will not doing this miserable task cost me, because fear is holding me back?” Then, write down the answers.

  • The answer may surprise you.  For instance, your answer, depending on the task, may be something like; I may have missed an opportunity to connect with my future soul mate or spouse in that café because I was afraid to just…talk to them. 

    Or, your answer may be; If I don’t finish my business plan, because I am afraid the company will fail or people will make fun of me and my idea, I may never experience the potential success, material wealth and happiness or confidence that a successful business can bring about. 

    Alternatively; if I don’t finish it, I won’t be able to pay a GM to just manage my business for me while I sit around in my underwear, eat pizza and get high. 

    If that is your thing of course.  Each to his or her own.

    The answers to the question are extensive. But the question is an important one.  It is designed to highlight what you may lose by not doing the task and open you to myriad possibilities of what you might gain, versus being mired in negative outcomes. 

    Remember, on the other side of fear is so much possibility and magic. 

    • Identify and visualize the pleasure you will experience when finishing the task.  There is ultimately a positive intention or reason and subsequent pleasure behind the struggle of the task. You need to think about what that positive intention and pleasurable outcome is, and then in vivid detail, picture yourself experiencing that pleasure. If it is finishing a report for work, imagine your bosses happy face or words and gestures of congratulations from your colleagues; the “oohs and ahhs” of your friends when they hear you fluently speak a new language, or relaxing with your feet up, eating a giant burrito and watching The Tiger King with your new boyfriend, who you mustered up the courage to talk to while waiting in line at the bookstore .

    • Forget your current limiting identity. Start thinking about who you want to become, and how this task is part of the process in bringing this new identity to life. Refer back to Identity at the top of part 2 if you are slightly lost here.
    • Identify a bigger motivational purpose.  Ask yourself, “what is the purpose and value of doing this “thing”. Remember, if you don’t know why you want to do this or what the value of the thing you are procrastinating on is, then you are likely to give up or eventually, begrudgingly, finish the thing with a lot of unnecessary pain.

    • In the absence of a bigger “purpose”, have a “mini” purpose for this current task For example, rather than just slogging through a work task in a typical half-assed way to justify a paycheck, make your mini purpose to attack the task from a new and innovative perspective, and see if you can learn and apply a new tactic or strategy that may potentially make you more valuable to the company and to your boss.
      Or, instead of mindlessly completing your assignment just to pass one of the least interesting courses within your degree, why not make this an opportunity to get creative and introduce a more exciting and unique way to approach the assignment. Aside from the motivational aspect of this mini purpose, it may actually be an opportunity to challenge yourself by applying something you thought you would never use, into a functional job tool for the future.

    • Break the bigger goal into smaller manageable (and preferably logically sequential) pieces.  Remember, “small wins” or baby steps. Completing each small goal will keep you motivated as you are witnessing real and tangible progress throughout the process, and literally bring you even closer, step by step, to completing your larger goal. 

    • Reward yourself for each small task or goal you complete.  I don’t mean hitting the crack pipe celebration, but just a small congratulatory thing. Rewards will help you stay motivated.  You figure out what that is.  Here is, if you can’t think of a way to reward yourself, 155 ways to reward yourself for completing a goal or task. https://www.developgoodhabits.com/reward-yourself/

    • Think about and make the consequences of not doing the task bigger and more immediate.  Start asking yourself what the implications of not doing this “thing” will be.  Start picturing the serious impact that…say, not losing weight, not working on your business, not fixing your broken marriage etc., will have on your future self.  And then, hold yourself accountable to the task by telling a friend or colleague that you will pay them some amount of money if you don’t complete or do the task in a timely fashion.
      And make the money you pay substantive enough to hurt your wallet if you lose the bet.  Otherwise you will just laugh off losing a small amount of money, and continue your procrastinating ways.
      I also suggest making a public announcement to your friends and family of the task you are working on, the reason you need their help, and for them to follow-up with you every day or two over email (to the entire group) on the status of the task.  If you procrastinate…you will look like a useless and flakey asshole.  You can even make a public monetary bet with them as well.

    • Enjoy the process.  Try and see each step in the process as enjoyable.  Make it fun, a challenge or a game if that’s what it takes. This is similar to play based learning that seems to be an effective learning modality for kids these days.  Reframe the process as a game, a learning opportunity, a sharpening of your mind or body. Incorporate some aspect of fun into the process. Aside from motivating you in an enjoyable way, remember that each step in the process is actually making you better at whatever it is you are doing, while definitively moving you closer to the finish line. If a child can do it, so can you.

    • Schedule it in your calendar.  If it isn’t in your calendar, it becomes easier to forget and not do.  Put each action item in your calendar, daily.  

    Last…but this could have been the first point honestly.  It has worked time and time again for me for anything I have been procrastinating on…

    • Just frickin’ do something.  As Steven Pressfield says in his book Do the Work, “The enemy is our chattering brain, which, if we give it so much as a nanosecond, will start producing excuses, alibis, transparent self-justifications, and a million reasons why we can’t/shouldn’t/won’t do what we know we need to do”.

    Just…start the work.   Don’t give your chattering brain any opportunity to give you an excuse to not do the work. 


    Starting the work will build inertia. Don’t think about it.  Thinking will only create excuses.  Just start any part of the work. Then, after doing something, go back and apply all of the above solutions I have provided.  I can’t tell you how powerful “just doing something” has been to me or my clients.  

    Now, close Instagram, and just do something.

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